Paris leaves jail.

Okay, I made an internal vow not to blog anymore about the tabloid trashiness of Paris Hilton going to jail, but this I just could not resist: After serving only five days of her 23-day jail sentence, Paris has left jail.

Apparently, it was because of some sort of "medical condition." Celebritis, maybe?

Now the rich bitch is under house arrest, and her sentence has been bumped back up to the original 45 days. But what's the point? Where's the punishment? Where's the justice when the entire time she can pal around with her famous friends, sip mojitos, shove some more dogs in her purse, and basically have all the freedoms that time in jail would've made her grateful for?

This is wrong.

Paris goes to jail.

You know, I do feel bad that I'm going to be just another one of those bloggers contributing to the media saturation devoted to Paris Hilton and jailtime. I mean, when I do stuff like this, I think about all the folks at Time and CNN who are...er...doing the same thing. But classily! They swear!

Well, since I'm already here, I may as well do this thing...and it's Paris Hilton, right? So I can't feel too badly. Right? Not like she's a real person or anything. Right?

Okay, before I get all hypocritical--I have, after all, gleefully covered this topic before--let me just say that I have not switched positions at all. I still think she's a rich bitch, and I still think she deserves the jailtime, and the media scrutiny (to some extent). But I think it's when I saw the TMZ video of her with her mother as she headed to jail--which I will not link to, out of whatever decency still resides in this ol' heart of mine--that I realized how truly demented the papparazzi is. It's millions of miles from being the worst or most intrusive thing they've done, or that I've seen, but I refuse to be one of the vultures picking at the bones of Paris' small, small, tiny, shattered dignity.

Well, at least not much. She went to jail last night. Yay! (And that wasn't sarcasm that time.) As I've said before, keeping her quarantined from the rest of civilization for as long as possible is very much a good thing. She has no talent; she's a vacuous, arrogant fool who likes to think she means something. And unfortunately, we've given her thoughts definite credence.

Plus: Proof that Sarah Silverman has the biggest balls of any comedian working today (except for perhaps Michael Richards) can be found here.

The Governator does it right!

Okay, so I may not always agree with Governor/Terminator/Danny DeVito twin Arnold Schwarzenegger's politics, but I've always given the guy credit for being a serious leader when he so easily could've become a parody (like the awesome berserk Governator on Conan O'Brien).

And it's this seriousness that leads him to extoll about the bullshit Paris Hilton petition which attempts to get her 45-day jail sentence for driving with a suspended license overturned, "I've never got any request. But I have many more important things to think about."

So the rich bitch will wind up in the slammer, and thankfully quarantined from the rest of civilization for a month-and-a-half.

That's so hot.